To my beautiful daughter Tynlee:
As I sit her and watch you sleep at 1 month and 4 days old, I can't help but smile. When I found out I was pregnant with you, July 7th 2010, after a camping trip in Dardenelles, I was nervous. I didn't want to lose you. I prayed to the Lord to please let this baby "stick" but ultimately wanted His will and plan to be done. I stare at you and tears feel my eyes. You literally TAKE MY BREATH AWAY. Your beauty, your grunting :), your adorable hands that are always open and moving, your crossed ankles, your flared nostrils, your super platinum hair, big blue eyes, precious heart shaped lips, chubby cheeks, and double chin.
Finding out you were a GIRL was more than I could have ever wanted. I just knew you were a "boy". I expected a boy. My family pops out boys left and right. Having a girl was too good to be true. But praise God, cuz at 16 weeks, you indeed were a girl and it was the most memorable day in my pregnancy with you. Watching your daddy's face when she told us, was priceless. He was hoping for a boy to carry on his name but when they said "GIRL", I saw his eyes fill up with tears and he couldn't have been happier and you have been around his little finger ever since.
I was so sick with you. Whether it was the nausea till 31 weeks or the preeclampsia from then on, you were SO worth it! I'd do it all over again!!!!! Even though our birth plan didn't go as planned, it couldn't have gone more perfect. Except for the part of you being taken from me right after birth. It all worked out amazing but that was the HARDEST thing I ever had to do, see you and daddy leave the hospital without me. After all we'd gone through together, I knew we could do it. God would deliver us and He did.
You are tough. I can already tell. You are strong. You are a fighter. Definitely a Porter girl :) Mommy gets so much joy out of you. I knew motherhood would be wonderful but this is over the top. Way better than I imagined it to be.
I always wanted you. I carried a doll around till I was 12. That doll was YOU. My future baby. You are perfect. The best baby I could have ever imagined. God TRULY blessed us with you. I couldn't have asked for better! Your very special. I praise God everyday for you. I pray for you constantly, for your protection, your health, and even for your future husband and the woman you will one day become. I pray you grow up to be a woman of God, accepting Christ at a young age and living your life for Him all the days of your life. God made an angel, a beautiful BEAUTIFUL gift. Thank you for always making mommy smile. You are my sunshine, my only sunshine.
Praise God for His Amazing GRACE. (your favorite song I sing to you)
As you wrap your little hand around my finger, tears fall from my cheeks because I still feel like I'm in a dream and I can't believe your really mine and I get the PRIVILEGE of raising you. I love you Tynlee Anne. Don't grow up too fast. Stay little.