Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Life is so unpredictable...

So I have the urge to write some things that I have really learned about our journeys in life...You can prepare, you can plan, you can have the perfect senerio written out for you, but 90% of the time, it usually turns out different..For instance:

-You think the first time you go "unprotected" you will get pregnant...Well at least that's what your parent's tell you! Lol...but really, when my husband and I started trying to conceive...or just didn't protect anymore...Nothing happened...4 months happened and nothing...Hmmmm....
-January rolls around and I find out I'm pregnant which was 5 months after we got married..2 days after I found out and told everyone :/ I miscarried!
-Life went on, we thought, we will keep trying, it can't happen twice, right? and we were so happy we could ever get pregnant cuz those 5 months seemed like a lifetime, if you know what I mean!?
-Months past, even a WHOLE year! Nothing.... :( We were getting so discouraged...Praying on our knees for the Lord to PLEASE bless us with a baby...I mean, you knew how bad I wanted to be a mom, at least everyone who knew me, and everyone who read my post about "always wanting to be a mommy!"
-Maybe God had BIGGER plans for us...maybe we were called to adopt
-As I started looking into adoption, it felt right.....
-But I still wanted my own...I wanted to experience pregnancy and experience bringing a baby into the world...I told the Lord, BRING ON THE SICKNESS, I'LL DO WHATEVER TO HAVE A BABY LORD!
-Well finally, March 2010 rolls around, missed my period, and wa-la, pregnant for the 2nd time....a week after finding out and again, telling everyone....I miscarried, yet again :(
-I couldn't take it.....We didn't understand...Our hearts were broken...But more than ever did I have to lean on God and trust Him...
-We were looking into fertility treatment/help at my doctor's office...
-But first as a woman, let me tell you how embarassing it is to not be able to have a baby...I mean, it's our "calling" right? But I kept reading in the bible of all these barren woman and it gave me courage and hope that even some of the Lord's woman, wouldn't conceive.
-Well, my OB was going to put me on clomid the next week(this was June) just incase I wasn't ovulating...
-We went camping on 4th of July weekend with my inlaws, I just knew something was up....It was 6 days before my period was even due, when we got home Tuesday night I ran to the store for a test....
-Wednesday morning 5am came, and I peed on the stick....YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Positive!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Even 6 days before my period was due!!!
-And that was my beautiful Tynlee growing inside of me!
-We kept it between Stephen and I for a couple weeks then once my doctor did an ultrasound and started me on the wonderful Prometrium(progesterone), we felt the URGE to tell the WORLD!!!!!!

But like I said, life is SOOO unpredictable...you have plans and they can so easily CHANGE!!
Who would have ever thought, getting pregant would be so hard! I mean, we were almost married 2 years before we got pregnant with a baby and it actually "stuck"!

Then, pregnancy happened...you remember how I said, Lord bring on the sickness, I'll do whatever...well, sure enough, I was sick...EVERY SINGLE DAY!!! I didn't throw up every single day, well at least no past 18 weeks....but I was nauseaus everyday....The Zofran helped a lot in the 2nd trimester but STILL, had to snack all day and make sure I took my nausea pill.....IT WAS ALL WORTH IT THOUGH!

Then, I delt with the high blood pressure and it was until 34 weeks that they even diagnosed me with it...pre-eclampsia or pregnancy induced hypertension...it was too late to start pills....

Back track, when I was 18 weeks pregnant, we started taking Bradley Childbirth Classes...We wanted to do an all natural birth...We were fully prepared...Eating healthy, knew all the relaxation techniques, didn't want pain meds or an IV, but I knew I would have to get an IV because I had the LOW platelets and high blood pressure...So I was prepared to LABOR AT HOME until I couldn't take it anymore. Walk around the hospital while having contractions. Take a shower in the hospital. Sit on birthing ball. Etc. Well, IT WASN'T LIKE THIS AT ALL!! The $200 on class was worth it in the sense of meeting a wonderful sweet couple, having a great instructor, and having to use those relaxation techniques after my water broke ON IT'S OWN(only thing that happened naturally) cuz those contractions were SOOO painful, I mean, she was COMING!!! I was throwing up and in so much pain...But I remembered what I was taught in Bradley and my husband was the BEST!!!!!!!! Always telling me to relax!!!

So my birth, was FAR from natural besides my water breaking on it's on...I was 36 weeks when they induced me...with Citotech, Cirvidil, and dreaded Pitocin! They also put me on Magnesium cuz of my high blood pressure which made me stay in bed cuz it makes you feel like you are SO hot and have the flu and with me needing to stay in bed, they put a catheter in and HOLY COW that was annoying without the epidural...I felt EVERYTHING!!!

Then just when things start working and my water breaks and I get to sick on the bedside commode(I wasn't supposed to be outta bed) but I was already in bed since Wednesday and it was Saturday..I couldn't contract in bed ANYMORE!!!

I felt the urge to push so she checked me and sure enough, Tynlee's hands were coming out first...

See, Not everything GOES AS PLANNED! :(

But everything worked out the way GOD WANTED IT TO! He was protecting us! And Tynlee HAD to be born by c-section! She had a growth on her mouth...seriously...God is AMAZING!!!!! He protected us the WHOLE way through!!

Then, my baby comes out and her and my husband have to leave for Stanford 2 hours away while I stay in Modesto... :(

But God brought us through...

Now, I feel blessed...I feel so blessed that the Lord watched over us and His children..He delivered us!

Even though things didn't go the way WE WANTED IT TO, everything was done because God's hand was in on it...

If you read my birth story you know that the "epullis" on Tynlee's mouth grows in the womb, it probably would have obstructed her breathing if I had gone full term but since I had the preeclampsia and they induced me, it was large and still prevented her from eating, it didn't hurt her breathing AT ALL!!! Thank you LORD!!!

Also, if she woul dhave been born VAGIANLLY, it coul dhave bursted and caused me to hemmorage...

My recovery was amazing..Up walking the next day! I wanted to get to my baby SOOO bad!!

Her surgery was a HUGE success, and I got there an hour after she got out from surgery..

Things don't always GO as we have planned...But boy oh boy, God still pulled through and showed us His plan, in the BEST plan and that HE IS IN CONTROL no matter how much we prepare!


So do I want just ONE child do you ask, because I was so sick with Tynlee and because of everything that happened with her? and us? Well, I would LOVE more children, but if ONE is all the Lord has for Stephen and I, I will be BLESSED and HAPPY because Tynlee is amazing. truly the greatest gift from the Lord. And she completes me....

1 comment:

  1. what a beautiful little blessing Tynlee is to be the daughter of such an incredible mama! I am so thankful that even though almost nothing went as you had planned, it all was a miracle, and perfect, and such an incredible story! We love you all so much, and we're blessed to be that couple you met in birthing class. Our lives are better because you are in it!
    Love, Anna and Brookie!!

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