Friday, July 27, 2012

BIG SAP.

I sit here as the emotional person I am. even worse since I've become a mom. I've turned into a big sap, to say the least. I sit here and hold my sweet 7 week old baby girl and tears are falling onto her precious cheeks. Tynlee is napping in her crib and Anistyn is fast asleep on my heart. My house is completely quiet and all I hear is my precious baby girl breathing. I feel guilty..

These 7 weeks have flown by and I am letting it. I worry so much about a clean house and all the "unimportant" things being a wife and mom intells. I sit here and pray that God will help me forget the cleaning...forget the laundry, the dishes, the vaccuming and dusting and enjoy my precious blessings while they are little. Savor these moments. cause they are the ones we will always remember and hold dear. Having our babies safe and under our roof.

They grow up too fast to just let it "pass". I want to let them be little. Sleep in my bed. Kiss them every chance I get. Read to her when she brings me the book. Hold her when she raises her arms up to me even if I am in the middle of dinner. Let her stay up past her bedtime and play with daddy. Let her splash in the tub a few more minutes just because.

Things have happened lately around me that have caused me to stop....stop...stop...and hit my knees in thanks. Thanks because my babies are HEALTHY. IN MY ARMS. SAFE. and just so thankful I was chosen to be their Mommy. God knew exactly who I needed. These sweet girls opened up my heart to a love I never knew was there.

 I love how Tynlee gets a boo boo and comes running to me as her "healer". How she yells "Ma" from her crib and when I walk into her room...I get the biggest smile as her "Life saver". Anistyn stops crying when I "shush shush" in her ear as her "comforter". They depend on me for everything. and what a blessing that is. My deepest desire for these sweet beautiful girls is for them to always cling to Jesus. My prayer for their life is not like most. I definitely want them to be "happy" but happy is relative. We can all be happy. it's how we chose to live. so any situation can be happy however you look at it. but my number one prayer...is for them to be saved at a young age...as soon as they feel the conviction. and to love Jesus all their life and serve him faithfully. I prayed this prayer even before they were born. and as silly as it sounds...I already pray for their husbands. That they will be men who fear the Lord and love Him more than anything. I hope and pray we raise them in a way that thy won't settle for anything less.

 I look forward to the years ahead...tea parties. dress up. "house". barbies. dance class. getting colored pictures from Sunday school. singing specials at church. riding their bikes for the first time. but I want to wait on all that...I want to soak up and ENJOY this time...here and now...because too quickly it will be gone. In the blink of an eye. Don't blink right??

 My babies will soon be little girls then teenagers then women, wives and mothers. And I never want them to question my love and care for them. I would do anything for my daughters. literally. ANYTHING. They are the most precious gifts the Lord can give us. Children are truly precious.

 Holding my 17 month old toddler in my arms while she's fast asleep at night..I think where did my little 5 pound baby go. She grew up and she's not stopping. They are both changing everyday. Each stage is so fun so enjoy the stage your in instead of hurrying to get to the next. Let them be little...it won't be like this for long, like the song says...

 So Tynlee and Anistyn...CLING TO JESUS...and know mommy and daddy love you more than we can even describe...you will know this love once you become mommy's.

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